I haven’t wanted to write for awhile.
Every time I sat down to write a blog post, I didn’t know how to put into words some of the changes that have been occuring in my life lately. I didn’t know how open to be, how personal to get… I can barely synthesize what’s going on in my brain, so forget trying to get it into words.
Simply put, I am moving to St. Louis as soon as I can find a job. I’ve thought long and hard about it, and I think it’s time for me to try and pursue dance in an area where there are more opportunities for me.
I’ve been in a rut in Columbia. I’m not creating enough, I’m uninspired, and I haven’t been able to find a full-time job here. I’m through living in stagnancy. I’m ready for a new challenge and the growth it brings.
However, my anticipation for change lies cheek to cheek with another concept that is a fundamental part of my personality — procrastination as a result of a fear of the unknown. This will be the first time I move for ME, and not for another person. I lived in a small town my whole childhood, went to college in a smaller town to be at the same school as my sister, and I moved to Columbia to be with my boyfriend and dance with a group in Columbia.
The other big change in my life is that I recently ended a long-term relationship with a really wonderful person who I grew apart from. I wish him the best, I truly do. He changed my life for the better and was a constant source of support. Unfortunately, sometimes life pulls two people in different directions. We both owe it to ourselves to walk our own paths.
This morning has been job interview craziness… I’m sitting at a coffee shop between my second and third interviews. Wish me luck!